Water – Action Hero Movies

This movie is full of trashy drama and juvenile remarks — it’s all a bit silly, but it has some decent action and curious story features too. I rate it Watchable — that’s a few levels below average, and it couldn’t be much worse, but it’s Watchable nevertheless, if you’re bored and haven’t seen it recently enough to remember how it goes — mainly thanks to its mix of strong and mediocore cast members. If you have seen it before and vaguely remember certain features — and maybe even if you haven’t or can’t — you may still find certain patches are highly skippable for the sake of your own sanity because not every fan of smooth action hero movies wants to sit through scenes of childish screaming, panicking and running past fictional creatures etc, or standing on a cliff and arguing about how to get down it, or even sailing a fantasy submarine vessel without much else going on, for prolonged durations. Indeed, certain patches are barely watchable, and highly skippable, but certain other patches are mildly amusing so it balances out as Watchable.

Cast Members

Josh Hutcherson stars as the rebellious teenager come young man. He’s acting straight here, acting interested in the girl, but he can’t hide his actual bentness to save his life.

Dwayne Johnson plays his stepfather who joins him on his journey as a rare chance to bond with him, and an aged Kristin Davis (from the obscenely named series in the city) plays his mother although we only see her briefly at the start and the end, when everyone’s home. Michael Caine plays the 2-years-missing grandfather who found the island before his grandson — he has the odd bit of banter with Dwayne Johnson, which is mildly amusing.

Then Luis Guzmán plays the pilot for hire, and Vanessa Hudgens plays his daughter — they both come along for the ride when their helicopter crashes in the storm around the island.

That’s pretty much the whole cast there, except the odd cop and homeowner who shows their face in the opening police chase scene.

The Jungle Cruise (2021) stars Dwayne Johnson as a ship captain for hire, and Emily Blunt as a woman seeking a legendary miracle cure from a plant hidden deep in the Amazon jungle. The chemistry between Dwayne and Emily is pretty good here. Her tag-along ‘brother’ played by Jack Whitehall is less entertaining but plays his role adequately. Jesse Plemons does a decent job as the main baddie.

By near the half way mark, this movie looks set for a Bang Average rating, which is markedly better than Journey 2, mainly because it’s more mature (while still a bit childish) but also because it’s generally a better production, with better humour. Having said that, it goes sharply downhill around the middle, as there’s a mix of extended boring patches and disgusting patches. It eventually gets a bit better again, but never really re-attains the levels of fun and enthusiasm as it had earlier on. For this reason, plus the fact it’s a bit off-genre, I’m going to rate it just So-So for the action hero movie fan, which is just one level above Journey 2 in the end.

Cast Members

See also