Theme: Assassins

For Your Eyes Only (1981) – Roger Moore

The chemistry between Roger Moore (as James Bond) and Lois Maxwell (as Moneypenny) is getting quite revolting by now. They both look like someone’s grandparents. Lois even looks like she could be a cross dresser. But she’s been in that position since the start of the Sean Connery era and stays throughout the Roger Moore era. We only get a new Miss Moneypenny when the Timothy Dalton era begins. Still, better late than never.

After a nice ski chase in the opening of The Spy Who Loved Me, Roger Moore does another one in For Your Eyes Only, but this time with a bit more context. It works quite well. It includes some brushing through alpine trees, and may have somewhat inspired Timothy Dalton’s epic snow chase on a cello case in The Living Daylights (1987).

For a movie that’s trying to be more romantic than usual, there’s a lack of attractive women in this one. Still, French actress Carole Bouquet plays Melina Havelock, the lead female, and makes for a slightly interesting character.

One of the best things about this movie is when Bond teams up with a well resourced guy called Milos Columbo – someone who Bond initially thought to be his enemy – played quite well by Chaim Topol.

There’s a couple of long diving scenes in this movie, which includes the use of small submarine-type vessels as well as independent scuba diving and some completely unassisted breath-holding diving too. It initially seems to drag on a bit too long for those who have seen it before, but scuba divers and underwater explorers may appreciate it, and gets a bit more interesting after a while (when James Bond and Melina Havelock get caught and tied up but make their escape).

The ending has a nice cliff-climbing and fortress infiltration scene.

John Wyman plays KGB agent Erich Kriegler, the main antagonist in terms of brawn, while Julian Glover plays Aristotle Kristatos, the main antagonist in terms of brains. They both do a fair job but nothing amazing.

I have to say this feels like one of the weakest Bond movies, so I’m going to rate it Lower-OK, below most of the others. It lacks a great enemy or a great female or a great plot, but Roger Moore still pulls it off in his usual style. Although Roger Moore went on to do a couple more Bond movies after this one – namely Octopussy (1983) and A View To A Kill (1985) – the shortcomings in this movie (For Your Eyes Only, 1981) may have inspired Sean Connery to come back with Never Say Never Again, produced outside of the usual Eon Productions team, and released shortly after Moore’s next movie Octopussy in 1983.

Assassins Secret Agents

The Man With The Golden Gun (1974) – Roger Moore

Roger Moore delivers a strong performance as always, in this movie, which was his second outing as James Bond.

It’s good to see the return of JW Pepper, the funny sheriff from the previous Bond movie, Live And Let Die, making some funny appearances this time while on holiday with his wife. Just like last time, Clifton James does a fantastic job in the role of Sheriff JW Pepper here.

The main baddies in this movie are Francisco Scaramanga (played quite well by Christopher Lee) and his unforgettable midget henchman-come-butler Nick Nack played very well by Hervé Villechaize.

The lead female in this movie is Britt Ekland who plays Mary Goodnight, and the next main woman is Maud Adams who plays Andrea Anders. They’re both Swedish models, and both do a fair job here. Maud Adams returns as the lead female in Octopussy, even though she was killed off in this movie.

The mirrored maze of a duelling room within Scaramanga’s secret island lair was probably inspired by the secret mirrored room on Han’s island in Enter The Dragon which was released in 1973, just 1 year prior to this movie being released.

I rate The Man With The Golden Gun as an OK movie. Not quite as good as Live And Let Die but not far off. Pretty standard for an old James Bond flick.

Assassins

Mr & Mrs Smith (2005) – Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

This is a weird movie, with some very good attributes and some areas lacking. It’s like an action packed assassins movie crossed with a cheesy slow romantic drama, crossed with satirical comedy.

Brad and Angie are of course legends in practically everything they do, and this is the movie they hooked up on, to become the Brangelina supercouple. So in a way, this movie was the reason Brad divorced Jennifer Aniston, although the writing was already on the wall for Jennifer as she didn’t age too well.

Brad Pitt plays John Smith, and Angelina Jolie plays his wife, Jane Smith. Both are assassins, purely by co-incidence, and working for rival firms. They’re married to each other yet somehow managing to hide their real jobs from each other, until eventually they bump into each other when they have the same target to kill. Then they need to kill each other, and they try to, but then they fall in love again. It’s a simple cheesy story, with plenty of fun to it, a fair amount of good action, and an extremely lighthearted vibe.

This movie had potential to be a lot better as an action movie, but due to its mix-up of genres and its general weirdness and most likely complacency (like we see in practically all movies where multiple superstars come together, although “too many cooks” syndrome is probably a factor too), I have to rate it just OK, no more. I’d rate it a bit higher for first time watchers, but for rewatching after a few years I’d say Mr & Mrs Smith (2005) is just OK.

The Mechanic (2011) – Jason Statham

The Mechanic is a decent little movie starring Jason Statham as an assassin who is betrayed by his employer, tricked into killing his mentor, then trains up his dead mentor’s son who eventually attempts to kill Jason’s character in revenge when he discovers who killed his own father. That’s the plot in a nutshell, with a few interesting assassination scenes.

Jason Statham is his usual self – a cold to luke-warm character with a generally serious demeanour, athletic in fighting and kitted out with some good equipment. His trainee and would-be killer is played by Ben Foster who does a fair job – not amazingly captivating but not a terrible actor either – just somewhere in between. There aren’t really any other actors in this movie who get a good amount of screen time, it’s really quite simplistic. I rate it slightly lower than Assassination Games since that movie had two stars in one movie, and slightly better mood setting especially around Van Damme’s home, but it was a similar genre and had a similar level of action, entertainment value and plot busyness.

Don’t miss the stronger sequel

If you enjoyed The Mechanic (2011) don’t forget to watch the sequel, Mechanic Resurrection (2016) where Jason Statham returns in a similar role but with a more interesting plot, and is joined by Jessica Alba and Tommy Lee Jones. I’d say the sequel comfortably better than the original.

Assassins

Hitman: Agent 47 (2015) – Rupert Friend

In the first ten minutes we get some good action with cars, plus a terribly made fight scene where the visibility is poor (half dark half light) and there’s constant flashing lights, camera angle switching and white noise music – enough to give a normal person heightened levels of stress – stay clear of this movie if you’re epileptic.

After 10 minutes, the camera work continues to be poor, zooming in constantly on normal conversations, to the point we can’t get an objective feel of the interaction. This is very restrictive mood setting and it’s in conflict with the kind of comfortable vibe that a good action hero movie should seek to create.

Add to this, Rupert Friend having less character than Timothy Olyphant, this movie is significantly poorer than the original Hitman movie of 2007. Still, it’s got a decent amount of action, a fair cast and a fair budget – it’s clearly better than a B movie, and it’s kind of hitting the right genre, so I think we can rate this movie as just OK. Better than barely watchable, so not the lowest rating out of all the movies we’ve featured on this site – just one level better.

While in the original movie, Timothy Olyphant played a cool calm killer whose cheeky charisma started shining through, making it an interesting recipe. In this movie now, Rupert Friend has a totally flat personality – there’s nothing shining through except a weird mix of anxiety and meek personality. No wonder his fight scenes are all over the place with switching camera angles – he probably can’t throw a decent punch or kick to save his life.

The lead female is played by Hannah Ware – her character has extra-sensory perceptions, and is the estranged daughter of the original chief scientist behind this cult of assassins. Unfortunately, her acting isn’t much better than Rupert Friend’s – they’re both made for drama, not action hero movies, and most definitely not lead roles in action hero movies. She has the constant demeanour of an abuse victim, and she lacks the ability to adjust her mood according to the requirements of the scene. She clearly only got this role because of who her parents are and what cult she’s been raised in, in real life.

Zachary Quinto plays the chief antagonist in this movie, and unfortunately, he is also kind of made for drama. He has the constant demeanour of a kid in a candy shop. Being skinny isn’t enough to be a good action movie star, you really need good physical coordination and a collected look in your eyes too.

The director, or whichever producer was really calling the shots, should have probably been sacked along with pretty much all the cast members, then we could have probably picked a load of random guys from the stunt team to replace them all and made an equal or better movie with the same script & budget. It seems like, the actors here are all behind-the-scenes crew members who decided to have a party and pretend to be action heroes themselves. While this probably isn’t true, it’s not a million miles off, since Quinto is also producer, while Friend & Ware are best known for their parts in political dramas, and the other roles are all played by people with similar producer & dramatist vibes.

On the plus side, the plot gets a lot more interesting as it nears the half hour mark, and we get some interesting scenes, before more boring drama. This movie pretty much alternates between decent and mediocre scenes throughout.

Assassins

Léon: The Professional (1994) – Jean Reno and Natalie Portman

This is an assassin movie with a twist. Starring Jean Reno as the master assassin, and a young Natalie Portman as his unexpected sidekick.

If you can forgive its inappropriate undertones, this is otherwise a pretty good assassin-themed action movie. Reno and Portman both act very well, and Gary Oldman does a decent job as the main antagonist and a senior DEA agent.

It’s a simple plot, zeroed in on certain things, and generally made to high standards with strong performances by lead cast members – kind of like The Transporter in this way. However, Léon director Luc Besson was widely accused of inappropriate innuendos, and Natalie Portman retrospectively has mixed feelings about it, summing it up as ‘complicated’. Some people consider it a cult classic to this day. Feel free to make up your own mind about it. All in all, I give it a decent 7.5/10 rating but must advise it is liable to offend some people due to indecent innuendos.

Assassins Vengeance

Assassination Games (2011) – Jean-Claude Van Damme and Scott Adkins

Classic moody old Van Damme and classic moody prime Scott Adkins join forces in a beautiful depiction of two expert assassins colliding on a job then joining forces to finish personal vendettas against the odds. The only reason I don’t rate Assassination Games higher is because it has a fairly simplistic script and probably a lower budget than it deserves. The basic concepts in the plot are good, but they fail to flesh out into a more comprehensive plot to entertain us on another level which we should be considering the stars involved. The script is thin but the two action hero superstars carry this movie into a moderate success. The opening scene seems almost B Movie quality, but it quickly improves. Granted, there are some cool sets, like Van Damme’s apartment with secret rooms, and his agent’s lair was convincing too. All in all, it’s makes for decent viewing when you haven’t seen it in a while.

Supporting cast includes Kristopher Van Varenberg, also known as Kris Van Damme, and Bianca Van Varenberg, also known as Bianca Bree and Bianca Van Damme – these are Jean-Claude Van Damme’s two children from his current wife who he divorced then re-married (Jean-Claude has a son to ex-wife Darcy LaPier also – that one being called Nicholas Van Varenberg). Indeed, Jean-Claude Van Damme’s name is actually Jean-Claude Camille François Van Varenberg. In this movie, his daughter Bree plays the comatose wife of Scott Adkins’ character, and Van Damme’s son Kris plays one of the enemies of Adkins’ character.

Assassins Kidnap

Mechanic: Resurrection (2016) – Jason Statham and Jessica Alba

Mechanic: Resurrection (2016) starring Jason Statham

This movie is a little bit more interesting than the original, with a better plot and a better supporting cast.

Jason Statham is in his element here, as an assassin tasked with overcoming more adversity this time round than before. He’s given a series of difficult assassination missions to complete in order to save his girlfriend who is being held hostage.

Jessica Alba plays his girlfriend – she does a solid job in this lead female role.

Tommy Lee Jones also does very well in his supporting role that has only a small amount of screen time towards the end of the movie.

Sam Hazeldine does a decent job as the chief baddie in this movie.

Michelle Yeoh performs adequately, albeit with a snotty nose, as a friend of Statham’s character who looks after a resort where he keeps a safe house – she gets a good amount of screen time.

All in all, I rate Mechanic Resurrection (2016) one or two levels higher than the original Mechanic (2011) due to the improved plot and the improved supporting cast. It’s always nice to see a sequel outperform the original, considering it’s usually the other way round.

Assassins Riots

Hotel Artemis (2018) – Dave Bautista

Hotel Artemis is a novel concept that works quite well with the help of stars like Jodie Foster who plays the friendly but strict old lady who runs the hotel; Jeff Goldblum who plays the feared hotel owner and local mafia boss; Sterling K Brown who plays a lead role as a criminal taking refuge in this secure hotel for member criminals; Sofia Boutella who plays a deadly assassin; and of course Dave Bautista who plays the hotel’s one-man security force.

The action scenes are plenty, although there are some slow drama scenes between, which make this movie a bit less entertaining for action junkies, especially when it comes to rewatching it before having very well forgotten it.

Although the basic concept is an interesting one, that seems quite creative and exciting, the plot is otherwise barely existent, so this movie is barely a fraction of what it could be with the current cast and a much more substantial script.

Overall, I rate it pretty good for first time viewing, and decent enough for rewatching every few years.

Assassins

The Equalizer 2 (2018) – Denzel Washington

The new plot features in this sequel almost makes up for the lack of awe like we had in the first movie. It’s very similar in style & genre but the stage is already set so we get straight back into the story with The Equalizer 2. It’s a solid follow up movie but slightly inferior to the first in the series since there’s less of a big reveal factor here, and this one gets a bit more into gritty drama vibes, although the new interesting plot features almost make up for this. There’s also no antagonist or even any supporting actor this time round on the level of Marton Csokas from the previous movie, but Pedro Pascal does a fair job as Denzel’s shifty frenemy. Denzel himself is just a few years older here, and seems a bit more relaxed in the role now, which isn’t such a good or bad thing, it just blunts the edge a bit.

Perhaps the sound or lighting or camerawork is also responsible for less of a crisp vibe this time – maybe budget was a factor, although the budget was pretty much the same as last time – it was estimated between $55m to $73m last time and was around $62m this time round. Or maybe the crew were busy tripping on substances, since the catering staff for the next sequel (Equalizer 3) were busted in possession of cocaine just a few weeks after they started filming in Italy.

Like last time, the ending is overly drawn out – this time even worse so, which makes for a poor rewatching experience towards the back end of the movie. And there’s no cool scenes at the very end this time either – instead it practically turns into a messy soap opera drama.

Overall though, it’s still a decent sequel, especially in the first half of the movie. It’s well worth watching the whole trilogy sequentially – the third movie in the Equalizer series came out in 2023.

Denzel Washington in The Equalizer 2 (2018)

Assassins Blood Hacking Sci-Fi Vengeance

Bloodshot (2020) – Vin Diesel

Bloodshot is a novel concept – creative and action packed – great for anyone who’s never seen it before. It is a bit one dimensional still though. The introduction of the hacker is a nice plot development but aside from that it’s all very simple.

Vin Diesel is his usual self – a fairly entertaining action hero, but a bit dryer and slower than my favourite action movie stars, although he oozes energy from underneath the surface. This role doesn’t perfectly suit him, but he does pretty well in it nevertheless.

Supporting cast includes Eiza González, the lead female – she does quite well in her role as an attractive assassin being controlled by Guy Pearce’s character. Lamorne Morris does quite well as the coding whiz who hacks the controlling technology to set Vin’s and Eiza’s characters free.

Guy Pearce does alright as the main nemesis on the brains side – the guy who controls Vin Diesel’s character until he breaks free – but he is a bit too meek in demeanour for such a power hungry role – a naturally stronger character here could have made this is more convincing movie.

Sam Heughan does a good job as the main nemesis on the (tech assisted) muscles side – he has a very convincing attitude for the role.

Alex Hernandez also does alright as one of the main team members. Good attitude for the requirement of the role.

Toby Kebbell also does quite well, as the first victim of the mind-controlled main character played by Vin Diesel. He displays an impressive contrast of acting styles here, from a savage psycho killer with a screw-loose wacky side, to an innocent and vulnerable victim with strong understanding and quick reactions.

Talulah Riley plays Vin Diesel’s wife – her performance was fair enough, although it was a bit washed & wafery – a more attractive & powerful woman like Eiza González could have done a better job in this role and helped make the movie more convincing since the plot is so heavily based on Vin Diesel’s character being so attached to his wife and so moved and vengeance-seeking when she’s killed.

Overall it’s a busy action packed movie and quite creative in its core concept, but is a bit one dimensional in terms of extended plot detail. It’s especially interesting for those who haven’t seen it before or in many years. Due to the strong special effects, fairly rich action, generally decent cast, and quirky concept, but with a dodgy nanite theme in-keeping with so many movies released around 2020; I rate Bloodshot about equal to its rival Hobbs & Shaw, or Black Panther 1 and 2. Indeed it’s disappointing to see so much pushing of the idea that technology in our body is a beneficial and even cool thing, especially when it comes to nanobots messing around in our blood according to their own discretion or an outside controller. Bloodshot is an awesome movie the first time you see it, if you can forgive its dodgy theme features, but significant tedium sets in and significant flaws become much more apparent if you rewatch it too often.

Assassins

The Equalizer 3 (2023) – Denzel Washington

In stark contrast to the first movie in the series, which set the mood beautifully from the outset with the help of expert sound effects, this movie if far too trigger happy on the sound effects at the beginning, to the point it’s just a lot of noise. But the noise effects mostly sort themselves out once the movie settles down beyond the opening scenes – although they do occasionally come back and make you think “what’s all this noise for?” since it’s twice the volume of the actors’ voices and a bit chaotic in places.

Equalizer 3 also has a bit more nastiness than those before it – more explicit blood & guys, and more nefarious methods of wounding – there’s multiple scenes guilty of this stuff even within the first 15 minutes – this stuff is better suited to a Horror Genre movie, it doesn’t belong in the movie of a smooth action hero. Whatever happened to the Denzel that apologised for having to kill someone even when they totally deserved it? This series has clearly gone down hill both morally and artistically. But most movie sequels are worse than those before them, and when you factor this in, it’s not a bad trilogy to enjoy. As with the previous movie, this one has a nice injection of extra creativity in the form of novel new plot features that make it a generally enjoyable experience for fans of the original. All three movies in the Equalizer saga exhibit a similar style of action albeit done to declining levels of quality, and have their own plot angles which makes them individually respectable for the most part.

An extra inconvenience with Equalizer 3 compared to those before it, is the amount of foreign language dialect – this movie is set in Italy and there’s a fair amount of Italian without built-in subtitles, and many subtitle systems fail to translate the Italian parts, but good subtitles can be found on some websites, and it’s mostly an English based movie still.

Denzel is also getting on a bit in this movie, which is 9 years on from the original. He was never particularly well built for an action hero role. His shape is average – a bit of a dad bod – and his posture is quite hunched and involuntarily bouncy like someone unathletic who can’t fight at all. This has been an issue in all three movies, but now he’s an older man too. Denzel is always a strong actor, and this role kind of suits his calm & calculative, serious demeanour, although it was a better fit in the original when everything worked better. But on the plus side, the debilitating injury in the plot of this movie suits his old age and hobbling way of walking in a way that we didn’t have in previous movies – it kind of clicks together in new ways now.

In-keeping with the trend set by the last two Equalizers, this one also has an overly drawn out action scene near the end followed by a positive short scene at the very end. And in-keeping with the trend of going down hill with each sequel, this one’s ending is even worse than the last one. A shame because it goes a long way towards ruining the overall quality of the movie, when the long ending is weaker than the standard set by the bulk of the movie.

Assassins

The American (2010) – George Clooney

The American (2010) is the epitome of a slow movie. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a slower assassin themed movie – not even close.

When you think of all the silent bits of standing around, walking, driving, and basically doing nothing that a really good movie condenses out… If you stuck all that junk filler content together to create its own movie (adding just a few minutes of mildly good stuff) then you would end up with The American!

I skipped forward through about half of this movie. It’s seriously boring. But there are some mildly interesting scenes. There’s a serious lack of script, and a serious lack of words. Around 40 minutes in, I very nearly gave up on it entirely. I dare say this is an Unwatchable movie, but I did watch most of it, skipping past the worst of it from the middle onwards.

What more is there to say? George Clooney is getting old – he’s nearly 50 here. He poses a lot, without saying much. His performance isn’t bad, but the script is practically non existent. Why would he waste his time with garbage like this? Maybe there’s an audience for this kind of slow & near-silent movie, but it’s not for me. I think I may have tried to watch it once or twice before, but gave up after just a few minutes.

It takes me back to the days of having only 5 options on TV, when we regularly watched the ‘least worst’ option and may have been passingly amused for a few moments here & there but was generally bored stiff and would never willingly tune in to that kind of tripe in the days of abundant choice online.

Admittedly it does warm up a bit, in the back end of the movie, as it becomes clear there are people tracking him down, and he gets very close to a woman who he doesn’t trust after finding a gun in her handbag. The last half hour is kind of respectable, with several mildly entertaining scenes not terribly far apart – it’s still rather slow but not nearly so torturesome as the first hour was. It’s like a snailpace old James Bond movie with budget slashed and a depressing final moment. I feel like a mug for even watching it. Never again! The things I do, so you don’t have to…

Assassins Kung Fu Sci-Fi

The One (2001) – Jet Li and Jason Statham

The One is a pretty cool Jet Li classic. It’s a simple but pleasant sci-fi packed with kung fu by Jet Li. There’s some energetic solo demonstrations of Xing Yi and Ba Gua to enjoy, plus the usual fast-paced choreography.

The main hero and the main villain are both played by Jet Li (they came from different universes). The villain is trying to kill the good guy in order to gain his power. He’s already killed 123 other versions, making the remaining 2 versions of Jet Li very powerful as they’ve automatically absorbed the speed & strength of those who died (power is split between survivors). The bad guy is trying to kill the good guy now, to become the last remaining one, at which point the universe could explode or the remaining one could “become a god” they say.

Jason Statham has a significant supporting role, as does Delroy Lindo (who was also in Jet Li’s movie from the previous year – Romeo Must Die). They play a pair of inter-universal cops here, tasked with keep both versions of Jet Li alive, to prevent The One from being, at all costs.

Assassins Training

Wanted (2008) – James McAvoy and Angelina Jolie

As the plot goes, there are certain nerdy people born with extra sensitivity, who think they’re prone to panic attacks. But if they recognise, appreciate and tap into this hyper-sensitivity, they can become abnormally skilled movers with supernatural reflexes and calculation capabilities. Kind of like Rain Man (with Autism) meets Limitness (on NZT).

I’m not a fan of the mentality pushed early on in this movie, that it’s somehow a good thing, and a superior thing, to be a killer. But to its credit, this mentality kind of gets dispelled later on.

Action wise, it’s pretty strong from the outset. There’s Matrix-style diving through windows in bullet time, and there’s spinning bullets round corners like Beckham bends footballs. Plus there’s a few high-budget high-speed car chases. This is a fast action movie, intermittently. It has many story-setting slow drama scenes too, but fortunately they usually don’t drag on too long.

James McAvoy takes the lead role in this movie. He does a fair enough job. Not the typical macho action hero, but that’s not the vibe this movie was going for. Not to everyone’s taste, but it kind of works OK.

Angelina Jolie (in her early 30s) plays the lead female in this movie. She’s the main selling point of this movie, considering her fame since Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001) where she became a household name and soon went on to hook up with Brad Pitt on the set of Mr & Mrs Smith (2005), although she was also in some strong movies in the 90s such as Hackers (1995) where she played the lead female, although she looked a bit different there.

Morgan Freeman plays a major supporting role, in a Morpheus-like position, as the head of the cult of assassins.

Chris Pratt plays a minor supporting role early on in this movie, as a colleague of the lead character. He’s best known to action hero movie fans as the star of the Guardians Of The Galaxy movies. He looks a bit different in Wanted though. Fun fact: he’s been married to Arnie’s daughter, Katherine Schwarzenegger, since 2019.

Overall, I rate this movie as Pretty Good, alongside the likes of Wonder Woman and Ghost In The Shell. The reason I don’t rate it even higher, on a par with movies like Hitman, The Equalizer and The Transporter, is because the lead male character isn’t totally my cup of tea. He’s a bit of a beta-male. Plus, the script has a few too many moments of intentional distastefulness for my liking. It’s a shame, because the goodness in the plot, and many exciting moments in this movie, are worthy of a higher rating; but I guess every Pretty Good movie has some relatively outstanding moments.

Great plot twist half an hour before the end, to keep things very interesting, just when it seemed like the plot was starting to run stale. Great ending too. It’s rare to see an action movie whose creativity and entertainment value doesn’t dwindle towards the end.

Assassins Ninjas

Ninja Assassin (2009) – Jung Ji-Hoon (Rain)

This movie has a bit too much explicit blood & gore squirting around – they must have spent a lot of money on red paint. It’s got a bit of a sadistic side.

The script is intermittent with interesting bits interwoven with boring bits. There’s plenty of gritty and monotonous action mixed in with the more exciting bits. There’s a lot of decent action still, and it’s a fascinating basic concept. Some of the mood setting / atmosphere building is really top level, but there’s plenty of cold, dull & dry patches too, so it’s likely to receive mixed reviews and overall I rate it as Pretty Good and on a similar level to Scott Adkins’ movie Ninja which came out in the same year (2009).

The main Ninja in this movie, Ninja Assassins, is played by Jung Ji-Hoon, a South Korean pop star also known as Rain. He plays a good guy who left a nasty clan of assassins. He befriends a detective played by Naomie Harris. They both do a decent job in this movie – not top-level acting, a bit cold & dry at times, but quite fitting at other times – far from terrible acting – they both did alright. There’s also a decent supporting performance by Ben Miles as Naomie’s colleague in the agency, and a fair performance by Sho Kosugi as the leader of the Ninja Assassin clan.

This movie was produced by the Wachowski brothers (as they were known in 2009, although they prefer to be called sisters now). This is the same duo behind The Matrix, as well as V For Vendetta and Jupiter Ascending – hence the awesome special effects in places, the respectable cast members, and the dodgy innuendos (kidnapping children and torturing them to breed heartless obedient assassins).

There’s a lot of blade fighting in this movie – from swords to throwing stars to knives attached to chains. But the combat techniques are rarely clear – there’s a lot of flashing between camera angles, and loud music, and unclear tricking in low light, probably to mask the fact the lead actor is not well trained in martial art in real life. Jung Ji-Hoon said, for this movie, he trained several hours a day for six months straight. He learnt bits of all sorts of martial arts, including generic Kickboxing, Karate, Kung Fu, Tai Chi, TKD, and specifically for this movie, a lot of Ninjutsu work, especially weapons work – especially the Shuriken (Throwing Star) and Kusarigama (Dagger Chains). But he was still a relative novice, so the stuntmen looked after him well.

The ending is decent, with special forces bursting into the ninja school before they kill the main man; then he fights his main rivals back to back – the ‘older brother’ (the fellow ninja who happily killed his girlfriend according to clan policy) followed by the teacher of the clan.

Assassins Vengeance

Colombiana (2011) – Zoe Saldaña

Colombiana stars Zoe Saldaña as Cataleya (after a 30 minute backstory where someone else plays her younger self).

Zoe Saldaña is perhaps best known for being the main blue chick in the Avatar movie series, as well as the main green chick in the Guardians Of The Galaxy movies. She also played Uhura in the Star Trek movies. But as strong as all her other roles were, nothing tops her performance in the lead role of Colombiana so far as action hero movie connoisseurs like myself are concerned.

From its well crafted opening with great patience, sound effects, camerawork and cast members (including Amandla Stenberg who expertly plays a young version of Cataleya, plus Cliff Curtis who quite well plays her uncle Emilio living in USA, Jordi Mollà who quite well plays the main baddie early on, and many other strong supporting cast members)… To its smooth yet committed plot development that scarcely fails to retain the viewer’s fixated attention (especially for first time viewers but quite effectively for occasional rewatchers also)… Colombiana is an understated memorable near-masterpiece as far as female assassin movies go.

Lennie James also puts in a strong performance as the FBI agent in charge of identifying, tracking down and capturing Cataleya.

Colombiana has a simplistic plot, but it’s generally well executed with great tempo, acting and effects all round. When a less captivating scene starts to drag on too long, it tends to change pretty quickly soon after, in order to relieve the frustration, so boring bits are scarce and short at the worst of times – credit to the directors for that.

Having said that, the chunky middle of the movie is by far the best of it; stylistically reminiscent of Jessica Alba in the Dark Angel sci-fi series. The start, and even more so the long action scene near the end, are a bit gritty and one-dimensional, which can get tedious for frequent rewatchers of this movie. So while I would rate the majority of this movie ‘very good’ alongside the best male-led assassin movies like The Equalizer, Hitman, and The Transporter; due to its weaker ending (sure, it’s got a long & loud action scene, but that’s not everything) I have to shave the edge off it and rate this movie overall as merely ‘pretty good’ alongside the best female-led action hero movies like Wonder Woman and Ghost In The Shell, which is no poor achievement by any means – they’re still fairly strong movies, quite well made.

Assassins Savantism

The Accountant (2016) – Ben Affleck

The Accountant is a cool movie to watch for the first time, especially for anyone interested in how Asperger Syndrome (and Savant Syndrome) can affect the performance of a martial artist. Many movies have portrayed a slick, meticulously accurate assassin but few go so far as to portray such a well rounded account of autism by the lead character – this movie is like a cross between Hitman and Rain Man.

In terms of martial arts moves, there’s nothing flashy here. There’s a lot of quick-kill gun shooting and a bit of empty-handed combat of a similar nature. There’s no classical exotic moves but there is a good representation of the spirit of a ninja, you could say.

Casting wasn’t bad – there are multiple strong performances in this movie, including by Jon Bernthal (Marvel’s ‘The Punisher’) and above all the lead role by Ben Affleck.

There are times where production has shined by taking well-researched notions and strong creative ideas then doing them justice on screen, especially where traits of Higher Functioning Autism could manifest themselves in the life of a careful assassin.

The genre is a bit James Bond without the humour – it’s callous from start to finish but only faintly gritty and containing enough James Bond style features to make the movie very watchable by fans of that genre. It has a bit of a simplistic drawn-out ending which makes rewatching it less fun than it otherwise would be – perhaps the writers became complacent after a decent beginning and middle, or the producers ran out of budget to wrap things up in style, or they preferred to linger in the grittier drama genre that the movie exposed us to throughout, even though the bulk of the movie appeals to the opposite audience. There are probably certain people who love both genres, but for a fan of high budget action who steers clear of gritty drama, I would rate this movie an 8 for first-time viewing and slightly lower for rewatchings. Still, it had so much potential and such great good parts (demonstrated perfectly by the trailer) that it could have easily been rated higher with a bit more work, although that would probably have been to the dissatisfaction of gritty drama lovers – perhaps you can’t please everyone and trying to do so may have been the reason why this movie never achieved the heights it was knocking on the door for. Still, a good watch.

Assassins Conspiracy Rebellion

Equilibrium (2002) – Christian Bale

Equilibrium (2002) starring Christian Bale

This movie was made shortly after The Matrix came out breaking all kinds of records, and seemed to try to copy its style, with slickly-dressed plain-faced agents dropping guns from their sleeves and shooting guns from exotic martial arts stances as if performing a wushu demo. But it’s not just a corny ripoff; this movie has a quality of its own. Particularly appealing to people with an interest in the plight of a freedom-fighter movement against a hi-tech draconian police state. Like The Matrix, this movie is more of a sci-fi than a martial arts flick, but still contains plenty of fast-paced skilled combative action including empty-handed fighting, samurai swordsmanship and guns ablazing in ‘bullet time’.

Plotwise, Equilibrium basically follows the plight of the highest-ranked, most-skilled assassin from the government’s elite hit squad, from initially callously killing anyone he’s ordered to kill, to eventually becoming leader of the rebellion and overthrowing the evil dictator. It’s not too heavy on the plot so not a movie for drama lovers but has the balance just right for those who prefer adrenaline-rich action and steer clear of gritty drama. With a likeable lead character, entertaining techniques, strong scenery and a simple but powerful story, this movie makes an impact, scoring 8.5/10 for my taste.

Cast wise, there are some strong performances, and some less strong. Christian Bale is a convincing lead, albeit not a massive star, and Sean Bean adds a lot of value to this movie too, like he always does.

Assassins

Hitman (2007) – Timothy Olyphant and Olga Kurylenko

As the movie begins with kids being trained to be assassins from some kind of lab setting, while having barcodes tattooed into the backs of their necks, it’s clear the backstory to Hitman bears a striking resemblance to the TV series Dark Angel starring Jessica Alba.

Timothy Olyphant does a good job as the star of this simplified James Bond style movie – he has vibes of Michael Weatherly going on – they’re practically twins. Olyphant plays a highly skilled assassin called Agent 47 who has successfully evaded capture by police for a long time.

Olga Kurylenko does pretty well as the lead female in this movie. This was her breakthrough movie, before going on to take starring and supporting roles in many more exciting action movies, such as The Assassin Next Door (2009), Erased (2012), Oblivion (2013, with Tom Cruise), The November Man (2014, with Pierce Brosnan), Momentum (2015), Gun Shy (2017, with Antonio Banderas), Johnny English Strikes Again (2018, with Rowan Atkinson), The Courier (2019), High Heat (2022), Extraction 2 (2023, with Chris Hemsworth). Trying not to mention Quantum of Solace, as I can’t stand Daniel Craig trying to be James Bond – nevertheless Olga Kurylenko was in Quantum of Solace (2008) just one year after Hitman.

Timothy Olyphant, on the other hand, kind of disappeared, starring in no other major action movies after The Hitman, although he did take a minor supporting role in the Star Wars spin-off series The Mandalorian.

Robert Knepper (from Transporter 3) puts in a strong performance as the chief FSB (Russian secret police) agent in the movie. Dougray Scott also gives a strong performance as the Interpol agent who’s been tracking the assassin, Agent 47, around the world for a long time. That’s all the major cast members worth mentioning.

Overall, Hitman (2007) is a bit simplistic compared to a good James Bond movie, but it zeroes in on a certain style very similar to The Transporter or The Equalizer, and does it equally well. With a slightly stronger plot, and a slightly slicker and less suspenseful back end, it could be even better, although they all suffer from this same issue.

Assassins

The Equalizer (2014) – Denzel Washington

MARTIAL ARTS value	⭐⭐⭐⭐
ACTION value	⭐⭐⭐⭐
PLOT value	⭐⭐⭐
CAST value	⭐⭐⭐⭐

Continuing the vibe of The Book Of Eli (2010) where Denzel plays an expert assassin with a good heart, here we see him do much the same thing but with a more simple & standard plot.

The Equalizer (2014) masterfully sets the mood with the help of Hollywood’s best sound effects and camerawork, as well as some of its best actors in Denzel Washington and his main adversary played by Marton Csokas – they both do an outstanding job to match the unseen crew.

Marton Csokas looks like a cross between Robert Knepper (from Hitman and Transporter 3) and Tom Cavanagh (from The Flash). And what Cavanagh has that Csokas does not, is well represented by Eric Bogosian (from Under Siege 2). Anyway, back to The Equalizer…

Further supporting actors generally do a good job too, including Chloë Grace Moretz who plays the main victim Denzel’s character attempts to rescue; Melissa Leo who plays a politically connected senior member of the CIA (who Denzel’s character turns to for information on his adversary); David Harbour who plays a bent cop; and David Meunier who plays the local Russian mafia boss – these actors all do a pretty good job.

The action is mostly fluid and of a high calibre, although there are some slower drama scenes and there are some uncomfortable gritty patches. The ending is especially overly drawn out, from a frequent rewatcher’s perspective. This issue, combined with the simplistic plot, and the impression of great values being taught on the big screen when really we’re only seeing a watered down and twisted version of what they should be, mean The Equalizer is only half the masterpiece it could have been, from a smooth action hero movie junkie’s perspective. It really could have been as good as The Foreigner (starring Jackie Chan) or better, but it’s definitely not, due to these issues. Instead, I rank it on a par with The Transporter (starring Jason Statham), which has similar style, a similarly strong cast, a similar simplicity of concept, and is similarly let down by an over-extended weak ending, although in The Equalizer’s case, the fairly dull long scene near the end is followed by a few strong short scenes at the very end, to lift the mood.

The Equalizer is quite a classic, and is one of Denzel’s best performances – I rank it joint best alongside The Book Of Eli (2010). So it’s good to see a couple of strong sequels were made, just like The Transporter had. The Equalizer’s sequels aren’t on the same level as the original, but the sequels are both decent movies with slightly unique concepts nevertheless.

See also, the new TV series

Don’t miss the stronger sequel